i never knew i could hurt like this (Tuesday, February 10, 2009 / 11:17 PM)
I read in books. I saw in movies. I heard through stories.
Losing somebody.
I thought I knew the feeling. Indirectly, but nevertheless, I thought I could understand. I thought that when I cry over movies and sympathize for those who have lost, that I understood.
Losing somebody. So, so important.
I'm an idiot.
I should have known that these kind of things could never be understood through interpretations from the pages of a good book, or even by the best acting of the best actor.
Losing somebody is real.
I never thought I could hurt like this.
I want to be able to kiss her hand and tell her how much I respect and love her. I want to see her smile.
My heart is in pain. It hurts. I'll be lying if I say that it doesn't hurt, because the pain is unbearable.
Losing somebody.
I've accepted it. With all my heart, I have accepted it. It was by Allah's will, redha. But it will be forever hard. I never cried so much in my life.
I don't mind crying. I like it, even. Crying makes me feel better.
Losing somebody.
I've accepted. Really, with all my heart.
But it's hard :)
I'll be okay. Insyallah.
